Traitor Page 22

  “Yessir.”

  “Thank you. Go get some rest. You look half-dead.”

  Kieran sighed. “So they keep telling me.”

  They walked together to the door, a comfortable, uncanny silence between them. For the first time, Kieran allowed himself to actually hope that maybe they would get out of it alright after all. He could see his Mom and Dad and brother again. Maybe, Sarrin had been right all along: they needed Gal.

  As they parted, Gal called after Kieran, “And puts some pants on — I don’t know what Sarrin would say if she knew all the others got to see you in your skivvies.” The captain laughed as he disappeared around the bulkhead.

  Heat rushed across Kieran’s face, cold air biting at his exposed legs and arms. Soon, he could go home. For now, the pile of blankets in his quarters seemed just as good. A bounce entered his step, and carried him through the corridors. He couldn’t wait to wake Sarrin up and tell her about Gal — that she had been right never to give up — and before he fell into a deep sleep for a year or two.

  The door to his quarters opened with a whoosh, and a grin spread across his face. “Hey, Sarrin!” he called, stepping in. The pile of blankets on the floor was empty. “Sar?”

  Dread overtook excitement. The wall panel laid on the floor. Had she disappeared into the walls again, but she normally pulled it closed after her.

  A sound came from the latrine, quiet and muffled. He spun toward the closed door, the lights inside turned off. He paused, his heart thumping too loud as he strained to listen.

  “Sarrin?” He tapped the door gently, met by a quiet shuffling. She was inside. He slid the door open, fully expecting to admonish himself for being a fool when nothing was wrong, and for her to scream like his sister.

  Light spilled across the grey latrine floor, catching the edge of her foot and her grey coveralls as she vomited into the toilet. A dark pool of red crept across the floor.

  “Shit!” He rushed forward. “Sarrin!”

  “Don’t touch me,” she croaked, but he lunged forward the same. She curled up, dodging away at the last second. Her hands came to her face and he could see that was where the blood was coming from, the silvery skeleton shining in the dim light.

  He halted, hovering just over her. “Sarrin,” he begged — God, what was she doing? “You have to let me see.”

  “Don’t,” she mumbled, her voice far away, barely coherent.

  “This is too much blood.” He looked from the thick puddle to her ghostly-pale skin.

  She shook her head. “I need it out.”

  “I don’t understand.” His heart raced in his chest.

  “That’s where the monsters live.”

  He swallowed once, mouth too dry, eventually frozen in place.

  “I won’t die,” she said, though it was hard to believe — anyone else would have. “The skin is already starting to heal. My bone marrow is already regenerating new cells.” Her voice was tinged with despair.

  “Sarrin,” he reached out.

  “Don’t touch me,” she repeated, slumping back against the wall. The small girl curled in the corner, blood smeared across her body like paint.

  “I want to see was all, to help.”

  “Don’t touch me, not when it’s like this.”

  “Sarrin, I’m your friend. Let me help you.”

  She sniffed, burying her face in the corner. “It’s too much. It will kill you.”

  He reached again. “You won’t, I know it.”

  “It’s not up to me. It’s what they made me. I’m a monster.”

  “No, Sarrin.” She was talking about the nurse, he knew it as well as he knew himself. “You’re not a monster.” The very sound her saying it, the very idea, scorched his heart.

  He steadied himself with a breath, holding out his shaking hand, like he would try to coax a child. “Please let me see.”

  “No!” she screamed, throwing herself to the opposite corner of the little latrine. The blood splashed as she moved, her eyes melting in and out of focus. She had lost too much blood, her movements clumsy and slow.

  He couldn’t just watch her. He lunged, trying to trap her. She twisted and rolled, throwing his back into the toilet, but he clung on. “You’re not a monster,” he said through gritted teeth. “You’re not gonna kill me.”

  She caught him in the chest and sent him flying. Scurrying back, her bloody, glinting hands came up to cover her head, to hide.

  In the half-light of the room, he dragged his own hands through his hair. His stomach turned at the overpowering tang of iron coming from her blood.

  With the fingers of one hand, she reached under the flesh of the other and pulled, more of he skeleton extracted from its cover. But the bones would not separated, the titanium slipping out from her grip no matter how desperately she tried. “They shouldn’t be there,” she cried.

  “They’re your hands.”

  “They aren’t.” She returned to picking at them, to trying to pull them off.

  Kieran crept closer. He pulled the thick towel from the rack, stretching it between his arms, and launched again. He held her tight, wrapping her as she thrashed.

  Another incredibly stupid thing to do, he thought as everything screamed in pain from where she had slammed him into the toilet and his arms strained painfully. But he was in it now. Sarrin was his friend, and, as much as he called himself an Observer, he couldn’t let her die.

  Slowly, the thrashing stopped. Her body shook with sobs instead of violence, screams subdued to jagged breathing. Kieran wrapped himself around her as much as possible on the hard floor. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he repeated, rocking gently. IF she took energy from people, he let himself be full of light, of positive, calming energy, hoping she would feel it. “You’re not a monster.”

  She blinked in confusion, her face softening, some of the colour coming back.

  He reached for her hands, cupping them in the towel. She flinched half-heartedly, but let him rub them, nearly in a daze. “I wouldn’t have died,” she said.

  He found it hard to believe, with long tears running down her hand, the silver skeleton glinting through, and with the amount of blood on the floor. But the cuts were already starting to knit themselves back together, her skin tone starting to improve from deathly white to its usual pale hue. “I wouldna either,” he said. He wiped the blood off her face and arms.

  “I don’t understand.”

  He scanned her face. She was like a kid in his arms — he’d never seen her like this. Terrifying and deadly, yes. Serious and solemn, yes. Elusive and quiet, yes. But not bone chillingly despondent. Not irrational. “Sarrin,” he tried, “do you know what happened to Gal? Why he’s better?”

  She turned away, her face burying in the towel. “I ran into him in the hall. He was…” — she swallowed heavily —“dark.”

  Kieran sighed. “Why’d you do it?”

  She blinked, small and bloody. “Do what?”

  “Gal’s better. Looks great, like a huge weight has just been lifted. I know you pull energy from people, but you took his, everything that was wrong with him.”

  “I can’t control it.”

  He sighed, rubbing a towel over the world of the bloody steaks. “You have to let it go. It’s not yours.”

  She blinked, motionless as he scrubbed. “Why didn’t I take yours?”

  “I’m tougher than I look,” he joked.

  But the joke fell flat, and Sarrin shut her eyes, collapsing into herself. “You could have died. I could have taken everything. That’s what they did to me. I’m a monster.”

  He dropped back, leaning heavily against the wall as his heart rate returned to normal. “My mama always said, we need other people to survive. Sometimes we need ta borrow a little of their strength when ours isn’t enough. It’s not a bad thing. People need other people. That’s just how it is, no shame in it.” He rubbed his back, trying not to let her see as he checked for any extra crunchiness. “It’s funny, at home, everyone knows
this. Everyone just gets it, maybe not in so many words. But we care for each other, help each other. And we know when we hafta pull back, look after ourselves and not give too much away. If someone’s havin’ a bad day, you give ‘em a hug, you give a little bit of your energy so they can take that and feel a bit better. If you’re havin’ a good day, you spread it around as far as you can.”

  Her blue eyes searched his, full of confusion.

  “For some reason, people have forgotten we’re all in this world together. Their energy’s not the same. But you, I think you’re more sensitive, is all. You just need to learn to control it.” He put his hand on her back, and though she flinched away, he could feel the tug on him, feel her desperation clawing for more.

  The life that swam in her was powerful, and he realized that was probably how she could know all the things she knew, how she could count enemies through solid walls. Even, probably, how she could fight so quickly. He let her have a little, but he knew enough to be careful not to let her take it all. He couldn’t lose himself as he tried to help her.

  “You’re not a monster,” he told her.

  “You’re not scared of me?” She blinked, rivulets of water dripping down her nose, but already her eyes looked brighter, clearer.

  He smiled. “Never have been.”

  Leaning agains the wall next to him, she lifted her hands. “They’re not mine. They’re theirs. I thought that if I could cut them off, then I could be free of it.”

  He pressed his lips together, unable to offer more. “I get it.” They sat in silence, the flesh on the hands knitting back together before their eyes.

  “Come on.” Kieran stood, offering her a hand. “We have to get you to Hoepe before that scars wrong.”

  She ignored the hand, but pushed to her feet. She glanced up at him, questioning.

  He met her gaze, his lips twisting into a grim smile. He would take her away from this place. Away from a world that would do… whatever they did to her as a little girl. He would keep her safe, bring her to the Observer ship, a world where she could simply be.

  SEVENTEEN

  GAL’S HEART POUNDED IN HIS chest. The planet barrelled down on them, the same as it had been doing since they’d set their feeble thrusters in its direction. In a few minutes it would be in range.

  The others stood around him on the freightship’s small bridge, staring in disbelief, but Gal had known the planet would come for them. It always did. Returning to the planet was a last measure, one he would have avoided if there was any other way.

  He considered taking their chances adrift in space. But this was the Deep Black — there were huge gaps of nothing everywhere you looked.

  “What the…?” said Kieran.

  They stared at the viewscreen for a minute, Gal’s insides churning. “We should prepare to land.”

  “Cap’n,” Kieran followed him, “the hull-plating has multiple exposed sections. I don’t know if we can pass into the atmosphere safety.”

  Gal put a hand on his shoulder. “I know, you told me already. It will be okay.” If it had to work out, it would. That was simply the way.

  A feeling of deja vu gripped him. The last time he had seen the vivid green and blue planet, Gal had been terrified. Much like he was now.

  “Are you sure?” Kieran asked.

  Gal nodded once. “I know it’s hard to understand.”

  Kieran pressed his lips, considering. Far more went on in that head than Gal had ever given the boy credit for. There was a lot that was hard to understand, but Kieran just might. And that could be a problem.

  “Take us down,” Gal ordered the pilot.

  She turned to look at him, uncertainty clouding her face. “The thrusters won’t be able to counteract gravity and control our landing.”

  “It’ll be okay.”

  “Go ahead, Isuma.” One of the Augment doctors appeared beside him. Gal studied the abnormally tall man. His kin was sallow, eyes tight — tired, scared — a fact he had failed to notice in the middle of all his own struggles.

  The ship dove.

  Kieran inhaled sharply, but didn’t say another word.

  Clouds parted, the atmosphere splitting and wrapping around them as they descended. The pilot set them down easily in large clearing, one that had appeared almost perfectly in their path. They had arrived.

  The bridge erupted in claps and cheers, even Hoepe allowed himself a smile. Gal’s chest constricted. Hopefully she wouldn’t be there. Hopefully she would stay hidden.

  Rayne touched his shoulder, bringing him back from the thoughts that threatened to drown him again. Her arm was heavily bandaged, but she used her free hand. She gave him a gentle smile. “Are you coming?”

  The past clawed at him, but the demons did not appear.

  This would be okay. It was only a few days. He knew what they needed, kept it solidly at the forefront of his mind. There was no reason everything had to come crashing down.

  He steeled himself and followed Rayne and the others through the ship, pleased that the doctors had given her something for the pain and she seemed to have a new lightness in her step.

  The others congregated at the cargo bay door, eager to step off the ship. Kieran bent to remove the seal.

  “Don’t worry, Gal,” said Rayne. “They ran the atmospheric scans three times — it’s perfectly breathable.”

  He nodded. That had never worried him.

  Would Cordelia be here, or would she hide?

  The doors slid open, bathing them in wave of sweet, clean air.

  What would she say?

  Through the cargo bay, they descended. The Augments stopped, pausing at the jagged, torn-away ramp, staring at the scene in front of them. Beside him, Rayne gasped. She turned, her eyes wide. “Gal, it’s beautiful.”

  He nodded grimly. Cordelia had outdone herself. He jumped from the ship to the ground, setting foot on the first planet he had been to three years that wasn’t grey and dead.

  Everyone around him chattered and laughed, excitement burbling through them as they jumped down. Still, it did not make him feel easy.

  A woman stood in the centre of the field in front of them. She was plain, simple, average. Her look was colonial, a simple cap over her hair, her long dress laced up the back.

  Gal grimaced and pushed through the crowd.

  Cordelia smiled and folded her hands serenely when she saw him. “Galiant,” she said.

  “Cordelia. We need somewhere to stay for a few days,” he said.

  “I know.”

  He leaned close, whispering in her ear. “Nothing about anything else,” he said, partly to reassure her, partly to warn. Would Rayne ever understand it, if she knew what he had done? Would the others?

  Her eyes went cold, only a flash, and then she stepped back and raised her arms to the others. “Welcome! You must have had quite a journey. Come and rest.”

  Gal drew his shoulders up, as though he could hide as the others streamed past him. His eyes traced Rayne as one of the Augments helped her.

  “The compound is this way,” said Cordelia, leading them across the field.

  Gal grabbed her arm before she could go, his voice menacing. “Don’t show off.”

  She smiled serenely. “I’m glad you came. I’ve been so lonely.”

  Gal hung back. His wary eyes traced the line of towering trees that surrounded them. Above, the sky was bright blue, fluffy white clouds gently gliding past. Only, he knew there was no star here. The light, all of it came from the planet itself.

  His eyes drifted down to the ship, and there, beside it, standing as though he had always been there, was Aaron. The apparition walked over to him.

  Gal turned away. He had promised Rayne he would do better. That he would save them after all. He couldn’t afford to be pulled into another downward spiral.

  Still, Aaron advanced. “Remember who you are,” was all he said, sending a chill through Gal as he passed. In a blink, the man was gone.

  Wide-eyed, Gal took a
deep breath.

  He caught Kieran staring intently at the ground, at the perfectly manicured lawn. The others passed him by, until he was the only one left. He looked up, staring at Gal. Gal recognized the look in his eyes, even as it flashed away: cold, calculating, curious.

  “Nice planet,” said Kieran, in his laid-back drawl. “I can see why you didn’t wanna come here.” A smile bloomed on his face, practiced enough it was hard to know if it was real or not. He started toward the compound.

  “Wait.” Kieran was no idiot, not by a long shot, and the idea of him exploring and studying the planet was more than Gal could handle. “Get started on the repairs. I don’t want to stay here too long.”

  Kieran frowned, seriousness and annoyance passing over his face so quickly they were nearly imagined. “Whaddya mean? I need a little rest before I get started, Cap’n. I’m wankered.”

  “No, this is important.”

  He rubbed his face, grey and pale. “Year, alright. Yessir.” The engineer turned back to the ship, Gal watching him until he climbed back into the cargo by and disappeared.

  It would be okay, Gal told himself. The planet was dangerous, just as Hap said. But it was only a few days. Not enough time to discover Cordelia’s secret. Or his.

  * * *

  Sarrin followed as Cordelia led them across the clearing and through a path in the trees. A grey building rose up behind the tree line. It was the same grey as the UEC buildings, similar in its blocky design, but somehow there was a lightness to it. Sarrin felt lighter as well.

  Hoepe’s bandages had already come off her hands, the skin looking as though nothing had happened. Below the surface still sat a gleaming, inhuman skeleton, but today, it didn’t bother her, not as much. Kieran had made her feel better, whatever he’d done. And while it still scared her to think about touching anyone, especially him, he thought that one day she could learn to control it.

  There was no grey concrete wall surrounding this structure, nor grass that constantly needed to be watered and fed with artificial UV lamps. Instead there were bright flower gardens, meticulously kept, with abstract statues and paths and seating benches. A ravine with a quaint crossing bridge ran through the centre. The Augments around Sarrin seemed to grow an extra inch, the fresh air and the sunlight creating a warmth deep inside.